Thursday, February 23, 2012

THE GIRL WITH ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT: A movie pitch


With THE AVENGERS soon upon us, I’ve been wondering what kind of potential crossovers I would like to see on the big screen. And then I came up with this...

  This idea popped into my head on an exceptionally bland drive home after an utterly bland day and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.

While I initially dismissed it as utterly ridiculous, my brain started to do what it usually does with pointless minutiae and I began to seriously contemplate the implications of my diabolical scenario.  Soon the parallels between Stieg Larsson's dark mystery thriller THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO and Mitchell Hurwitz's classic mocdocsitcom ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT became too hard for me to ignore.

  • Both stories centre around a family once renowned for their wealth and status 
  • Both families are now isolated from the rest of society
  • Both families are composed of competing factions who belittle and bicker among each other
  • Both families have dark secrets with potentially catastrophic consequences
  • Both families require an outsider to come in and uncover these secrets
  • Both stories, though completely different in tone, take on the subject of the family's bizarre sexual peccadillos as a major theme 


Juts imagine the chaos if Michael Bluth hired Mikael Blomkvist to investigate his family's dodgy business practices (with Lisbeth Salander going undercover at the family real estate company). 
  • Would perpetual horn dog Mikael sleep with Lindsey? Or Lucille? 
  • Would would-be horn dog Gob come on to Salander?
  • Would Salander run Gob down with his segway?
  • Would she get on with Michael?
  • Would she get on with Lucille?
  • Would she get on with anybody?
  • Would Tobias completely misjudge the situation and decide to get a job as a crusading journalist at Millenium magazine?
  • Would Salander kill Lucille?
  • Would Oscar lose his hair?
  • Would Salander burn down the banana stand?
  • Would Buster tuck himself in a ball and wait for it all to be over?


It makes me so sad that this meeting of the titans will never take place.

Here's hoping someone in the know has a similar idea and posts a fake trailer for this masterpiece on FUNNY OR DIE. It would be a good cross-promotion for the ARRESTED crew's new movie and the sequel to last year's TATTOO (re)adaptation.

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