In the future, adolescent crime has become such a major issue that the government has developed a new, lethal solution to pacify the youth: Killer androids disguised as teachers.
This movie is the kind of genre mishmash I used to love. I still like them but I was absolutely obsessed with these kinds of movies as a kid. It felt freeing, realising there are no rules.
The best example of this type of movie is something like A Chinese Ghost Story, which manages to juggle multiple tones and genres with ease.
The opposite is something like Suburbicon - where it feels like different parts of the movie are battling each other.
Class of 1999 is not that well-written, or acted, or that thought out. But my god is it entertaining.
This film is technically a thematic sequel to Class of 1984, a more straightforward action drama about a teacher (Perry King) turning vigilante when a gang of bad kids attack his family.
I have not watched it in years. I do not remember it making much of an impression beyond the credit song by Alice Cooper (‘We Are The Future’).
Class of 1999 takes the barest inspiration form it’s predecessor - a gang of school kids battling teachers in a school - and goes absolutely ham.
The kids are styled like the marauders from a Mad Max movie; the robotic teachers are clear take-offs on the Terminator (hilariously the villains’ hidden weapons would be replicated in the third Terminator sequel).
If I wanted to break this movie down in terms of storytelling and characterisation, there is a lot to criticise. I do not want to do that - see the previous paragraphs.
The one criticism I do have is that the actors playing the robotic teachers (blaxploitation star Pam Grier, John P. Ryan and Patrick Kirkpatrick) have not come up with a shared idea of robotic behaviour. They are all kind of on their own.
Ryan is the standout as the old school disciplinarian. Armed with pipe and the piercing blue eyes, he is the stereotype of a particular kind of educator. There is a sadistic glee to his performance which falls outside of what the character is supposed to be.
I did not really care because he is also the best performer in the movie, and his simmering menace brings a real tension to his scenes. One could also argue the machines are reflecting the sadism of their own creators - an early scene mentions the machines are imbued with the perspective of their creators.
The third act is terrific, as the filmmakers finally let loose with their limited effects budget. A mix of make-up, puppetry and stop-motion animation, the robots’ final rampage is magnificent, and worth the wait.
It is a total rip of the third act of The Terminator but it works.
A silly, ridiculous mess, but worth watching.
